You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
Randomize
