Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
I didn't notice because vodka
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize
