It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
just survived the first fart of the relationship.
i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
Randomize
