Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
When did angry sex become our thing?
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
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