Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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