I want to make a zoo with you.
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
Randomize
