New invention idea: vibrating tampons
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
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