I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
a bus full of elementary school kids may or may not have seen me pissing off my front porch this morning
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
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