Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
My niece just threw up all over me. My sister's breastmilk was on my face. This is like a fucked-up porno gone terribly wrong.
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
