so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
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