doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Randomize
