He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
