I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
Listen, i know this is weird for you, but as your fuck buddy, id prefer if you didnt fuck her.
Youre asking too much from me
Randomize
