I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Randomize
