How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
It doesn't matter how many times you look in your purse, Your keys are not going to be there. Maybe you left them at the bar.
Maybe they fell out of my pocket last night when I rolled down the hill.
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize
