The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
Come share oat with me in your robe
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
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