If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
im starting to measure my showers by the number of beers i drink while im in there.
It's just like the Real World with babies
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
She tied me up with her honor cords...
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
I got inside last night via doggy door
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
Randomize
