They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
Randomize
