no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
i believe in u and ur pee
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
Randomize
