dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
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