I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
Randomize