There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
Go christen that room with your naked body.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
Randomize