This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
Women are like Alzheimers patiens. You can compliment them a million times in a day, but the next day is always a wash, you have to start all over.
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
Randomize
