i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
The homeless guy out front said it's his birthday and he asked us to join him for happy hour after work. He's buying a fifth of gin to celebrate.
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
Randomize
