How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
Randomize
