There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
Randomize
