would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
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