dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
The voicemail says i shouldn't bother ever showing my face there again, i don't understand
We visited your boss last night. guess you wont be paying the rent this month, eh?
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Randomize
