So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
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