Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
You're earring is so big in my mouth
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
Randomize