I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
It's not a walk of shame if you run
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
Randomize
