It was confusing and full of hummus
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
Randomize
