Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
Why can't people give useful wedding gifts...like sex swings or Nutella?
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
PANTIES FOUND
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