He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
