The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
When god put her together, he was drunk & feeling creative... a vagina here, sexually ambiguous breasts there, and a pair of shoulders that would make a linebacker jealous
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
The 666th photo in my phone is of him and if that's not a sign that he's secretly the Antichrist, idk what is. Also, bring more rum.
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
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