Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
I had a drunk dream I lived on a puppy farm. I hope this dream repeats every night of my life.
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
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