yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
Note to self: the judgement that occurs when unrolling your last 5 which was used to snort drugs the night before, to pay for alcohol before noon on a Monday is worth just sucking it up and taking an overdraft fee.
Wait a min, you had drugs last night?!
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
I went with vodka instead of tequila tonight so I make better decisions. Fool proof plan.
Randomize