guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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