Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
My mom called me and we started arguing as usual. I finally screamed at her "I HEAR YOU AND THAT 30 YEAR OLD FUCKING!" and hung up. She hasn't called back yet. I win.
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
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