You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
You made out with two different species that night
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
Randomize
