so that wasnt chicken after all
Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
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