My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
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