Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
Randomize
