By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
Randomize
