So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
And now I'm taking a break sitting on the bathroom floor thanking god that people who eat at subway are either too classy to piss on the floor, or are still relatively sober enough to not piss on the floor before 5pm.
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
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