I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize