OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
My dog fell asleep in his puke last night. He's only 5 weeks old and has more in common with my friends than I do.
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
Hello my rib-scented angel!
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