i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
Randomize
