He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
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