Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
Drunk in a bar in Texas. The 24 y/o hottie I am chatting up just called me a male cougar. I am dealing with this whole turning 40 thing juuuust fine.
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Randomize
